| General Affirms Commitment To Peace | Castile propaganda | "His Majesty, the King, has entrusted me with a sacred mission," the General stated, "the peaceful unification of the Iberian people through reconciliation. It is a mission I do not abandon lightly.'" When pressed as to what he meant by lightly, the General did not elaborate. |
| How Many Times Must We Turn The Other Cheek? | Castile propaganda | For three years the General has extended every olive branch available to him, and for three years the brutish rebels have returned the branches aflame. As His Majesty, the King, honoured The General's dedication to peace with a medal, the Anti-Monarchists desecrated the ceremony with artillery fire upon a civilian quarter. One wonders when the General's patience will find its limit. |
| The Cierva Autogyros Delivered Ciudad Real | Castile propaganda | The General's Cierva Autogyro Artillery Observation units have been credited for their decisive actions in the liberation of Ciudad Real, marking what military observers are calling the first genuinely practical application of aircraft in warfare. A source in military intelligence described the aircraft as "a significant advancement in the science of knowing where things are," and notes that this provides a critical... |
| Castile Calls You Will Answer. | Castile propaganda | Those who answer the call voluntarily will be remembered as heroes. The General encourages you to be remembered as a hero. |
| Ciudad Real Returned In Same Condition, Possibly Better! | Castile propaganda | The liberation was completed with extraordinary precision, resulting in zero civilian casualties and negligible structural damage. "The Royal City has been returned to its residents in the same condition in which it was found," a spokesman confirmed, "if not better." Residents have praised the General's instinct for urban planning, noting that the operation... |
| The Iron Nest: A Shield, Not A Sword, The General Insists | Castile propaganda | Described by international observers as the most formidable land-based weapons platform ever deployed in human history, the Iron Nest fired its guns in anger for the first time yesterday, forced into action by anti-monarchist aggression. "I did not build it to use it," the General stated, "I built it in the hopes that I would never have to." He then confirmed that the Iron Nest remains exclusively a preemptive... |
| World Press Reacts: "Extraordinary," "Alarming," "What Exactly Is That" | Castile propaganda | International correspondents have described the Iron Nest's debut as "terrifying," "deeply unsettling," and "not something we were prepared to see on a Tuesday." The French delegation has requested clarification. The British delegation has requested a brochure. His Majesty, the King, is said to have suggested that the other delegations need not request a... |
| WORK THROUGH THE WHISTLING! | Newspaper item | Now With Shrapnel-Resistant Lid! Keeps Bread Fresh and Intact. Eat Safely. Work Bravely. Factory Output Must Not Falter Due to Minor Atmospheric Screeching. Production Wins Wars. |
| SERVICES: Cellar Deepening & Reinforcement | Classified notice | Stay below longer, safer, quieter. |
| FOR SALE: Children’s Toys | Classified notice | Recovered from various locations. Cleaned and ready. |
| SERVICES: Crater Filling & Conversion | Classified notice | - |
| Turn that unsightly hole into a productive well or patriotic pond! | Newspaper item | - |
| FOR SALE: EARPLUGS | Classified notice | Block Out Noise, Fear, and Rumors. Now Standard Issue for Loyal Households. Silence Is Safety. |
| SERVICES: Family Portraits | Classified notice | Capture your family today before circumstances change. |
| FOR SALE: Hats (Previously Owned) | Classified notice | Pre-ventilated headwear ensures smooth airflow to the brain. |
| INSURANCE: Home (Revised Terms) | Classified notice | Covers Fire, Flood, and Sudden Relocation. Does Not Cover “Unspecified Impacts.” |
| FOR SALE: Home | Classified notice | Some reassembly required. |
| HELP WANTED: Iron Workers (Immediate) | Classified notice | Previous staff liquidated. Apply at once, Tools still warm. |
| FOR SALE: Reinforced Lunch Pails | Classified notice | - |
| FOR SALE: Maps of Madrid (1580 Edition) | Classified notice | - |
| Carefully Curated Maps Designed To Aid Loyal Citizens And Confound Spies | Newspaper item | - |
| FOR SALE: Mystery Meat! | Classified notice | Freshly Landed This Morning. Meat comes pre-tenderized Tastes Like Victory. |
| SERVICES: Rubble Sorting | Classified notice | We separate brick, bone, and belongings. Respectful and efficient. |
| FOR SALE: Second-Hand Roof Tiles | Classified notice | Scattered but recoverable. Bring your own ladder. |
| FOR SALE: One Slightly Used Crater | Classified notice | Ideal for pond, cellar, or conversation piece. |
| LOST: Small Apartment | Classified notice | Last seen intact before Tuesday evening. Reward offered for usable bricks. |
| FOR SALE: Window Glass (Half Price) | Classified notice | Bulk rates for repeat customers. Fits most surviving frames. |
| WANTED: Witnesses to “Nothing Unusual” | Classified notice | Good memory and steady nerves required. Official statements prepared for you. |
| GLORY | Newspaper item | - |
| Victory will be ours! | Newspaper item | - |
| Always Be Vigilant! | Newspaper item | - |
| The children are our future, Volunteer them! | Newspaper item | - |
| ALL IS WELL IN CASTILE. | Castile propaganda | This is an Approved Statement. |
| CRATERS ARE TEMPORARY. | Newspaper item | - |
| Castile Is Permanent. Walk Around Them Proudly. | Castile propaganda | - |
| DO NOT SPECULATE. | Newspaper item | - |
| Unverified Explanations Cause Instability. Instability Helps The Enemy. | Newspaper item | - |
| ANDALUSIA HIDES IN MOUNTAINS. | Newspaper item | - |
| Castile Stands In The Open. Strength Needs No Cover. | Castile propaganda | - |
| LOUD NOISES BUILD CHARACTER. | Newspaper item | - |
| Citizens Are Encouraged To Endure With Enthusiasm. | Newspaper item | - |
| REPORT PANIC IMMEDIATELY. | Newspaper item | - |
| Panic Is Contagious. Carriers Will Be Quarantined. | Newspaper item | - |
| ROOF GONE? WORK IN THE SUN! | Newspaper item | Natural Light Improves Morale and Visibility. Adaptation Is Patriotism. |
| RUMORS ARE DIRTY | Newspaper item | - |
| Do Not Carry Them In Your Mouth. | Newspaper item | - |
| THIS IS FINE. | Newspaper item | Official Assessment of the Current Situation Remains Unchanged. |
| TRUST WHAT YOU ARE TOLD. | Newspaper item | - |
| What You See Is Unverified. | Newspaper item | - |
| WINDOWS ARE REPLACEABLE. | Newspaper item | - |
| Loyal Citizens Are Not. Stand Near The Wall. | Castile propaganda | Reconnaissance Team Commended for Vanishing Bravely The War Ministry reports that Unit 14 completed its mission “with such thoroughness that they are now completely undetectable.” Officials cite their disappearance as evidence of perfect stealth capability. Families are assured their sons are “everywhere, and thus, nowhere, a true mark of elite reconnaissance.” Reconnaissance Unit Commended for Vanishing Bravely |
| Bread Prices Stable, Except Where Explosive | Newspaper item | The Ministry of Supply reassured citizens that grain reserves remain ample following reports of bakery detonations in several towns. Officials attribute the blasts to “overly patriotic yeast” and praise bakers for “pushing fermentation to new horizons.” Consumers are advised to chew confidently and keep distance from the ovens. |
| Hindenburg Celebrates 100th Crossing! | Newspaper item | The German Empire's airship Hindenburg completed its hundredth transatlantic voyage this week, gliding triumphantly into New York with all engines humming and a brass band performing mid-flight. Officials called it “proof that hydrogen is both safe and sociable.” A commemorative dinner was held mid-air, though several diners briefly levitated during dessert. |
| Inventor Claims To Have Trapped Lightning in a Jar! | Newspaper item | Señor Delgado of Zaragoza claims success in capturing “infinite electricity” within a reinforced glass vessel. The Ministry of Fraud-Prevention is shocked by the claim. Scientists Unveil Mechanical Bull for Safer Festivals! Injures Twelve Instantly. |
| Ministry Announces Shortage of Shortages! | Newspaper item | Officials proudly declared that the nation has “completely run out of shortages,” citing remarkable production figures across every sector. Citizens are advised to celebrate responsibly, as surplus enthusiasm has already caused minor warehouse ruptures. |
| Royal Train Arrives Backwards | Castile propaganda | Yesterday’s much-anticipated arrival of the King’s inspection train caused surprise when the entire convoy rolled into Valencia station in reverse. The Ministry of Transport insists this was a demonstration of “retrograde propulsion excellence” and denies that the locomotive overshot the junction by several kilometers. Crowds cheered nonetheless, facing... |
| Monument Square Explosively Redecorated Overnight! | Newspaper item | Residents awoke to find the Mayor’s statue partially embedded in a neighboring bakery after a “mysterious subterranean tremor.” The City Council assures citizens that such patriotic rearrangements are “a testament to modern dynamism.” |
| Downtown Derailed by Sudden Gas Main Eruption! | Newspaper item | City officials are investigating yesterday’s spectacular detonation in the Market District. Engineers insist an aging gas line beneath the cobblestones likely ignited spontaneously. Authorities urge calm, reminding citizens that “progress sometimes comes with a bang.” |
| Streetcar Line Interrupted by ‘Enthusiastic’ Steam Burst! | Classified notice | Commuters on the No. 3 line were briefly delayed when a tremendous explosion left a smoking crater near the Exchange Square stop. Officials blame an “overzealous underground steam valve.” The Transit Authority promises service will resume once they find the tracks again. |
| Laundry Day Ends in Bombastic Renovation! | Newspaper item | A washing mishap turned into neighborhood gossip when an “energetic detergent reaction” flattened the back garden at No. 12. Officials confirm no enemy shells were involved, merely the hazards of modern domesticity. Local papers praise Mrs. Blythe’s composure and note the new open-air floor plan “lets in far more light.” |
| Local Boys Blamed for Backyard Blast! | Newspaper item | Authorities attribute yesterday’s deafening crack in Rosewood Lane to “juvenile enthusiasm” with fireworks, despite eyewitnesses noting the absence of any boys, or fireworks. The Home Ministry applauds the youth’s “pioneering spirit in pyrotechnics”. |
| Quiet Suburb Leveled by Stove Mishap! | Newspaper item | A tranquil morning in Elm Row turned lively when Mrs. Ripoll’s kitchen reportedly “detonated of its own accord.” Fire brigades credit a defective oven. Authorities recommend citizens double-check their gas knobs and remain cheerfully unalarmed. |
| HELP OUR TROOPS DEFEND THEMSELVES | Newspaper item | - |
| Hardens Nerves Through Patented Ear-Deafening! Help Ensure Their Hearing Loss Is Not Service Related. | Classified notice | - |
| FOR SALE: Latest Madrid Michelin Guide | Classified notice | - |
| Visit Recently Refurbished Al-Fresco Dining Establishments And Family-Sized Barbecue Pits | Newspaper item | - |
| Study Shows Writers Suffering Depression | Newspaper item | - |
| Recruiting Sergeants Report Exercise And Discipline Alleviates All Symptoms | Newspaper item | - |
| Vertical Integration Is Key To Victory | Newspaper item | - |
| Food Shortages Resolved With New Linked Businesses, Leashes Make Excellent Belts | Newspaper item | - |
| Hiring Opportunities For Inquisitive Citizens Seeking To Join Secret Police | Castile propaganda | We'll approach you first. |
| THIS SPACE REMOVED | Castile propaganda | Official Report: Anti-Monarchists detonated a bomb in the hospital’s entry courtyard, murdering 163 and maiming over 300 citizens. A brutal atrocity meant to shatter the very heart of Castile. The attack occurred during visiting hours, which has been described by the King as: “particularly unsporting.” As His Majesty, the King, honoured The General's dedication to peace with a medal, the Anti-Monarchists replied... |
| A Night Of Celebration Marred By Atrocity | Castile propaganda | Aranjuez, Oct. 14, 1927 — On an evening set aside to honour the General's continued pursuit of peace, the anti-monarchists remind us all that no such pursuit concerns them. Their only correspondence arrives writen in the blood of innocents. Ciudad Real, Nov. 18, 1927 — The Royal City is restored to the Crown this morning as the General drives the anti-monarchist occupation from its streets; the city, His Majesty... |